A Torontonian Thanksgiving

As most of you probably already know, I am not, for the first time in my life, spending Thanksgiving in Indiana with my family.  I can't decide for sure how I'm feeling about it.  I mean, I'm sad, because I'll miss being with them, but we've planned a web-cam date for sometime when all of the festivities are going on at my parents' house.  If we were to try and go, it would be a lot of driving, traffic, and we'd be totally rushed the whole trip.  We've resigned to the fact that it's just not feasible, and we're saving the couple extra days for the Christmas holiday.  As of now, it looks as though we'll be off from December 18th through January 4, so we'll divide that time into thirds (Ohio with Grouper's family, Indiana with my family, and Michigan at our house where we'll be most likely doing some type of renovation).  I can't wait.

We're going to stay here for the weekend, and I'm still not sure if I'll be working tomorrow or Friday. No one will give me a definite answer either way.  I'm hoping I won't be, but if I have to, so be it.  We're going to try to fit in a trip to the One of a Kind Craft Show that will be going on downtown (I can't wait, it looks so awesome!), we're probably going to make a really small Thanksgiving dinner for ourselves, I'd like to go see A Christmas Carol, and I plan on watching lots of movies and sports.  YAHOO!

I'm going to be the typical blogger and be pretty scarce around here for the next couple days, and I'm also going to be typical in that I'm about to post a list of things I'm thankful for...cliche, I know, but I don't care.

I'm thankful for.......

• my family
• my friends
• Delillah, of course.
• the blogosphere: all of the wonderful people I have met through blogging, the creativity I've been witness to, the life stories people are willing to share....just all of it.
• the New Moon movie and all of the hard work that Taylor Lautner put in at the gym preparing for the movie....egads, what a body!
• the fact that the Grouper and I are both gainfully employed, no matter how much I complain about my job
• chai tea lattes from Starbucks
• my health--especially the fact that I have no issues after my miscarriage, so hopefully I'll be back in the baby growing business soon!
• and most of all, my wonderful husband, because without him in my life......well, I wouldn't be who I am.

A gratuitous Grouper and Gidget honeymoon photo just for you. :)

The Life-Changer.....

I fell victim to a severe case of Facebook stalking yesterday after a certain update showed up on my live feed.

What update was this, you ask?  Pictures of the infamous ex were staring at back at me....I hadn't even gone looking for them, they found me.  It doesn't matter how long I go between instances of thinking about him, he always pops up, one way or the other.  Maybe this is lame, but even after all these years, I can't bring myself to "unfriend" him.  And he hasn't unfriended me, either, so I guess deep down, we both still care about what happens to the other person, even though we're both married and happy now.  We also share nieces and nephews, and I've heard through the grapevine that he checks out my page for new pictures of them since he lives so far away and doesn't see them too often.

Anyway, I digress.  Once I started looking at the pictures, I couldn't stop.  I went back and basically found every picture that he was tagged in over the past year.  It was a really weird experience, because I recognize his face, but I honestly don't recognize anything else about his life.  I don't know him anymore--but how can I expect to (and why would I want to, really?) when I haven't spoken to him in nearly 5 years. I've never been to the city where he lives, I've only met his wife (you know, the girl he cheated on me with) once, and he has a whole new set of friends, a career, and a bunch of other stuff that wasn't around when we were together.

Looking through the evidence of his new life, I started thinking about how my life is so astronomically different than it was 5 years ago.  I thought about how I could have been the one he married and how unhappy I would be.  He lives at least 12 hours away from any of his family and he rarely comes home.  He lives in a state that gets snow regularly starting in October.  He has alienated pretty much everyone he grew up with.  I wouldn't be able to function like that.  Even though I live in another country, I see my family almost as much as I did when I lived in the U.S. 

I thought about how that one moment in time--the moment when he single-handedly shattered everything that I knew and everything that I was sure of (it seems so trivial to say that now, but that's how I felt at the time) by breaking up with me unexpectedly because he "didn't love me anymore and hadn't pictured us together for a long time"--changed the course of my entire life.  In my nearly 26 years on this earth, that is the one moment that I can think of that altered the path to my future.  I've had some other life-changing moments, of course, but I wouldn't have gotten to any of those without the Ex dumping me.  I never would have gotten close to Tassels (she met me right before the break-up and helped keep me on track after it happened), I never would have taken the time to figure out who I truly was before getting serious with someone and eventually getting married, I never would have fallen in love with the Grouper, I never would have moved to Michigan, I never would have found some of the things that I treasure most in this world, I never would have moved to Canada, I never would have figured out what is truly important to me.

It's crazy and amazing to me how things work out sometimes.  From one of the worst things that ever happened to me came some of the best things that I could never live without.  Have you ever heard that song "Unanswered Prayers" by Garth Brooks?  If things would have happened the way I originally thought they should of, I would be in a completely different place surrounded by different people.  It's just mind-blowing to think about, in my opinion.

Have you ever stopped to think about your life-changing moments?  If so, what are they?

The bored, the rude, and the absurd

Warning: I'm stuck at the reception desk ALL DAY and I just finished my one and only project they had me working on. It's not even 10am. I think I'd be pressing my luck if I brought my knitting or read a book at the front desk (although I am going to be scouting out something to read online, that's for sure). So anyway, I'm warning you that this post may be really long, totally random, and may eventually cause eyestrain.

The bored: Ok, so I mentioned this already in my little preface, but I'll continue. I have NOTHING to do. All week. Well, except for the occasional phone call or visitor to check in. That's easy. My Google Reader is at zero (and you KNOW I have too much time on my hands when that happens), I've emailed everyone I can think of who I've been meaning to email (some people even more than once), I don't get my favorite radio station anymore, I can only be on Ravelry for so long, and people tend to get upset if I sit here all glassy-eyed and staring into space. I really need a new gig. Bad.

The rude: I mentioned this on Twitter yesterday, but I am appalled by how rude my "friends" can be. This is totally a high school type issue, but it's still frustrating, and no matter how hard I try not to be angered by it, the more it totally burns my ass. So said "friend" and I have been planning to go see New Moon since Twilight came out. We promised each other we'd go see it together. Always. About a month ago, friends of mine from Michigan got a bunch of tickets to go to the midnight showing on opening night, and they asked me to go. I contemplated taking a day off and driving down to go with them, but I then remembered my promise to my friend, so I declined their invitation. My friend and I decided we'd go on Tuesday (tomorrow) to avoid the initial rush. Ok. Flash forward to Saturday night at about 11. I get on Facebook and see a conversation between my friend and another co-worker about New Moon. My friend was saying how much she loved the movie and all this stuff. Co-worker says, "You cheated on Gidget and went without her?" Friend says, "Yeah, but I just couldn't stand waiting anymore, so I went. I'm sure she'll understand." Uh, seriously? So I stirred the pot a little bit and wrote back in all caps, "YOU DID WHAT?" I wasn't really that annoyed at first, but the more I think about it, the more annoyed I get. The reasons I have a problem with this:

1) How old is she? Thirty-one going on five? She couldn't be patient and wait for three extra days?

2) I was home all weekend. Did my phone ring on Saturday to see what I was doing or if I minded if she went without me? No. I didn't do anything this weekend, but she didn't know that because she didn't even bother to call before she went without me.
3) When she saw my facebook message, she called and left me an apologetic voice mail. I don't know why that annoys me, but it does.
4) She didn't even go with anyone, she went BY HERSELF. Lame.

I almost don't want to go now just to prove a point, but I am going to be a bigger person and go with her tomorrow night and not let on how annoyed I really was by the whole thing.

The absurd: I meant to blog about this when it originally happened, but it slipped my mind until the twit guy walked into our office today (without signing in, mind you, because he is apparently ABOVE the rules since he works for one of our divisions).  Grouper and I were going back home to MI a few weeks ago and we were at the gas station filling up.  A guy pulls up in the lane next to us and I start people watching, as I often do.  The guy has on a jacket from one of our divisions, and I recognize the name of the specific place he works.  Then I see he has on a name badge.  I read his name...I don't recognize the name, but I remembered it so I could tell Grouper.  So I keep watching the guy.  He doesn't fill up his tank right away, he instead starts digging through the garbage bin next to his car.  "WTF" was my first thought, but then I thought maybe he had just been there, filled up, and had mistakenly thrown away his receipt (if he's driving on company time or for the company, gas can often be put on to an expense account and he could be reimbursed).  Ok.  Fine.  So he keeps digging, pulling out receipt after receipt, looking, and then putting them back.  He finally gets the one he's looking for.  I assume he will then get into his car and drive away.  But no.  He then FILLS UP his car.  So maybe I'm jumping to conclusions here, but my assumption of what he did was this:  He found a receipt with a "desirable" expense on it (aka, higher than his real expense) and turned that one in to be reimbursed for it.  He never did get a receipt for the gas he actually put in his car.  It took me a while to piece together what he was doing, because I'm NOT a dishonest person and I would NEVER think to do anything like that to my employer or anyone else.  What an ass.  It's all I can do not to make a comment to him every time I see him today.  Is it just me, or does that blatant dishonestly bug anyone else?

Happy 101

Valerie and Eyegirl recently bestowed this lovely award upon me!  Thanks, ladies, you're the best!  I've been reading Valerie's blog, Next to Heaven, for quite a while now.  She's into being crafty, Twilight, loving her husband, cooking, and being a working woman.  I love her blog!  Go visit her (and her Etsy shop, Spunk and Sass) if you haven't already!  Eyegirl's blog is called Life as Eye See It, and she and I have recently become bleepy tweeps.  She's a great girl,she has a wedding coming up, and her dogs are ADORABLE! Stop by and say hi!  Tell her FG sent you!  :)

Here are the rules of the award:

List 10 things that make you happy.

Try to do at least one of them today.

Tag 10 bloggers that brighten your day.

Make sure to link back to the person that tagged you

 

10 things that make me happy:

1) My friends, both analog and bloggy

2)  Cuddling with Delilah (she's snuggled in my arms sleeping right now...it makes it kinda hard to type!)

3) Good TV (like Glee...I have it on right now!)  Mr. Shue singing "Endless Love," specifically.  He's a hunk.

4)  New music that my bleeps recommend

5)  Knitting - both wearing my finished products and knitting for others! :)

6)  Weekends

7)  The fact that Big Ten Network is free on my cable network right now.

8)  My husband.  He's my rock and deserves a gold star for putting up with me and my emotional craziness.

9)  Wine.  Grouper picked out a new one--a Shiraz Malbec by Fuzion--for dinner this week. It's cheap and it's gooooooooooood.

10)  The undefeated Indianapolis Colts.  Ahhh.

 

There are too many bloggers that make my day to choose from, so if any of you want to grab this award, go ahead!!

Food for Thought

Found this on Just Be Splendid (on Tumblr) and I couldn't resist the impulse to share it.

This definitely applies to my life lately!

Without a Trace

You know the feeling of security you have when you have something in your life, no matter if it's trivial or not, that you can depend on, no matter what?

It's a warm, fuzzy, happy feeling, isn't it?  Yeah.

My "warm fuzzy" that I'm referring to is the wonderful country radio station that I normally listen to each day while I'm sitting at the insanely boring reception desk.  I mean, granted, I'm not allowed to blast the music and rock out, but said radio station is usually creating a bit of white noise in the background of all of my computer work, phone answering, mail opening, and customer interactions.  And I love, love, LOVE the morning show.  The DJs are entertaining, down-to-earth, funny, and knowledgeable about country music (something that is rare around here).  I love all the music that is played, and I don't even mind the constant ribbing I receive from many of my co-workers for listening to "that hillbilly music."  I don't care if it's hillbilly or not, it makes me happy.  So there.

Anywhoodle, the other day, I listened to my favorite morning show, as usual, and I noticed nothing out of the ordinary.  The morning DJs stayed on a little longer than normal, as the mid-morning DJ was in Nashville covering the CMA awards.  No biggie.  I come back from lunch, and the music coming out of my radio suddenly sounds an awful lot like oldies music.  That's ok, I guess.....I like oldies.  I prefer country, but it was alright....I just assumed that the person who covers my lunch hour couldn't stand to listen to my music and changed the station (she's done it before).  Then I hear the call letters of the radio station come up.  And I froze. 

Those are the letters of my country station, I thought. Why the F are they playing oldies?

So I went to the website.  All of the country content had been taken down.  Here was the bogus message I found:

The New Country 95.3 wants to thank you, our faithful listeners for being our dance partners these past seven years. We couldn't have become Canada's most listened to country station without your loyal support. And while it was a great ride, it's time to introduce the next chapter in the ongoing history of the New 95.3.



The New 95.3 is now playing all the Greatest Hits from the 60’s, 70’s and 80’s. It’s upbeat, fun and will have you singing along to all your favourite tunes! You’ll flash back to memories of your first kiss…your first slow dance, your first car… those rights of passage that we all share! So sit back and enjoy the greatest of the greats…The Stones, The Beatles, Chicago, Boston, The Doors, Blondie, Fleetwood Mac…we could go on and on but you’re probably already thinking of all your favourite bands…count on it, you’ll hear them!

Dude.  Are you kidding me?  No warning.  Nothing.  Gone, poof!  And I've been trying my darndest to find another country station to listen to, and the only ones I can find don't come in very well on my little radio here or even in the car.

I'm lost.  In a fog.  No country music makes for a very unhappy Gidget.  Sniffle.

Tassels Does Toronto

Some of my favorite pictures from the weekend...

I'm Hungover.

Not from alcohol for once.

This is kinda hard to explain, and I'm curious to find out if anyone else has felt this way before.  It's a first for me.

I am literally emotionally hungover.  It's a crazy feeling.  There has just been so much stuff--both good and bad--going on in the past couple of weeks (I'm going bulleted list on this, ok?)

• My fiasco (parts 1 and 2)
• not being able to tell my sister about said fiasco until yesterday
• my sister's roommate finding out she's pregnant (accidentally, of course) and due the same time I would have been
• my best friend coming for a visit, and it was the BEST weekend I've had in a while! (more on that tomorrow, most likely)
• emotionally heavy stuff I learned from her this weekend that I was totally unaware of previously
• terrible, horrible, no-good, really bad news in blogland from some of my favorite bleeps in recent weeks
• stuff at work (including shortened work weeks for some people but not all--quite unfair)
• fighting with Grouper about work and his (what I perceive as) indifference about the whole thing
• and the list goes on.

I hit a wall this weekend.  Well, a few, actually.  The first one came with Tassels' heavy news. She told me while I was driving, and I almost had to pull over because I could barely see through the tears streaming down my face. I'm not going to elaborate any more than this--she shared a couple family secrets with me that she hasn't shared with anyone else.  Ever.  And I felt totally honored that she shared with me, but ohmygoodness.  My heart just broke for her, because I can't imagine carrying burdens like that around and not being able to tell anyone for so many years.  She did tell me, though--that was HUGE--, and she felt so much better afterwards.

After that bombshell, we went back to my house to watch Private Practice together, just like we used to in the old days.  Once again, I'm not going to go into major detail, but let's just say that the episode involved an immensely pregnant woman (I'm still having a bit of trouble with that, as hard as I try not to) and the result of what happened to the pregnant woman and her family was less than ideal.  And I cried.  And cried.  (Poor Tassels had to deal with a nut job all weekend).

So then I settled down from that and all was well, and then I got some bad news from OP.  If you haven't sent prayers her way, please do so now).

Why do bad things happen to good people?  That's been hard to wrap my brain around as of late.

Oh, and then I had to drop Tassels off at the airport after such an amazing weekend.  I don't know what I'd do without her in my life--seriously.  And when I had to drive away after leaving her at the terminal.  I cried again.  Such highs and lows, wow. 

Then Grouper was supposed to be talking to someone yesterday about our less-than-ideal work situation and find a solution to it.  Well, once again, he didn't, and I went off the deep end on him over all of it.  I know things are tough on him with work, and he claims he is going to find a solution, but with everything else going on, I couldn't handle the fact that he chose to ignore me struck out again.  We talked it out and hopefully this week something can be worked out. If not, I may be moving into the guest room.  I cried while we were talking--and when he asked me why I was crying, all I could say was, "I feel empty."  I lost a baby.  My best friend went back home, far, far away.  I hate my job.  Empty.

So I'm hungover today.  Numb is maybe a better word.  I'm all over the place emotionally and so tired at the same time.  Almost in shock. 

I just want to feel normal again.

I got an award!

As you know, I had a pretty crappy week.

But then Travel and Dive Girl from Journey and Adventure came in and saved the day!

She gave me an award.  And not just any award, mind you.....

I Shoulda Been A Stripper Award

Isn't that just fabulous?  And I agree, I shoulda been a stripper.  Not only would that totally thrill the Grouper, but I bet all this miscarriage/two countries B.S. wouldn't be going on if I was a stripper.  And I'd own better shoes.  You know, ones that look like this:

The rules are as follows:

1)  Post the award--of course.

2) List seven personality traits about you, as evidenced on your blog

one) stubborn

two) sensitive

three) flexible (not in the physical sense, but the "making plans" kinda flexible).

four) caring

five) superflously wordy, duh.

six) friendly

seven) strong (this is just what people say...not quite sure I believe it yet, but I'm getting closer. But I ran out of traits!)

3)  Pass it along to 7 others with notable personalities and let them know!

Extranjera @ What will I ever do with my life?

Esmerelda @ That's Esmerelda to you, Sir

Optimistic Pessimist @ The Audicity of an Optimistic Pessimist

RxBambi  @ A Day in the Life of a Would-be Bambi

McGillicutty @ Inner Rambling of a Mid-Life Mama

Novelista Barista

Beth @ What I should have said

Writer's Workshop: Leaf Blowers and Works in Progress

It's Writer's Workshop day at Mama Kat's....and this week's are REALLY good.

Describe the best/most creative punishment you have ever given your children or received yourself.
I don't know if this qualifies as "punishment" per se, but it is definitely creative.When I was in college, I'd come home from school on the weekends and do what basically every college student does---I SLEPT IN.  Late.  Well, my father is quite the early riser, and he's also one of those people who gets pissed off about it.  If he's the only one up in the morning on the weekend or on a holiday break, he's going to be loud so that he won't have to be alone.  He's not very courteous, is he?  Anyway, on one particular weekend, I was sleeping in past noon.  My dad had come back and opened my bedroom door at probably around 10am, and when he started loudly getting out pots and pans for breakfast, I promptly got up, closed the door, and went back to my slumbering.  He came back again, this time around 12:15, and said something about how I should get out of bed because I "wasting a beautiful day" or some other B.S. that parents say.  I still didn't listen, and the next thing I knew, I was being rudely (AND I DO MEAN RUDELY) awakened by the gasoline-powered LEAF BLOWER.  No, not outside my window....in.my.bedroom.  In my face.  Yep.  That's what I get for sleeping in late.......and my dad thought it was absolutely hilarious.  I think it is now, but I didn't think so then.

Show us something you did yourself!
Well, I actually have three somethings that I'm currently doing myself. 
1)  My parents brought Delilah the CUTEST gray hooded sweatshirt the last time they came for a visit.  (Don't hate, she literally shivers when she goes outside in the cold sometimes!)  IT's so cute, but it's so plain, and every Boilermaker fan needs a hooded Purdue sweatshirt, don't you think?  So, I solved the problem by sketching a Purdue "P" on to the back of the shirt and then enhancing it with Tulip paint.  It brought me back to my high school days!  I used to be the master at t-shirt decorating for sporting events.  Take a look, what do you think?  The gold paint is still a little bit wet, but I think it looks awesome!  Once it's dry, I'll have her model it for you.  ;)

 

2)  Something #2 is a baby blanket that I'm making for my new niece or nephew (due to arrive on Valentine's Day).  They are not finding out what they're having until he or she arrives, so I had to go for the minty green yarn.  I could have used a prettier color, but I always freak out when I have to use multiple balls of yarn (for fear that I'm not going to do a good transition and something will eventually unravel), so I used a HUGE ball of yarn that I already had that is guaranteed to be enough to make the blanket.  This is my first blanket and I searched forever for a pattern that didn't look too difficult.  This one is actually super easy; I only had to learn one new stitch--the slip, slip, knit stitch, and thanks to YouTube, that was a snap!  The color doesn't look very good in this photo; it's greener in real life.  If you can't tell, it's kind of a mossy pattern.  I'll post pictures once it's finished.

3)  Item #3 is a Irish hiking scarf that I started when we were on our vacation at the cabin.  I got quite a bit done on it that week, but I've barely touched it since because I want to make sure I get the blanket done.  It's a work in progress, I guess.  It's a basic cable knit and it's the first one of those I've ever tried.  I haven't decided who this scarf is for yet; it may just be for me because I like it so much.

Gidget CAN be crafty--who knew?